It seems much easier to view the weekend as a whole to help me feel better about my decisions.... or really one specific decision.
Sunday morning, 7am.....I felt the same as I figure the Patriots felt when they entered game day last week against the Jets. I had a plan and for 4 weeks prior, I did all the right things, I cross trained hard, I snowshoed the course on a very cold morning, I ate right, exercised and managed to lose 5 lbs, though I was feeling a bit tired from the workouts on Saturday, I was ready.
I procrastinated a bit this year, which is really not that unusual for me. There were many things I had not accomplished around the house for cold weather and the forecast for Sunday night into Monday was sounding pretty severe.
Saturday, I shoveled, cleaned roofs,got some time in on the snow shoes, actually worked my butt off to get as much done so I could ease any tensions for Sunday's race and the two football games. Though I did not accomplish everything I needed, the spill over to Sunday morning should not interfere with my plans.
Sunday morning I slept in a bit and didn't roll out of bed until 6:30 am,I was quite lame from Saturdays work but spirits were high and I felt good. By 7am I was ready and raring to get started with my remaining chores and three hours seemed like enough time as the race was not until 11 am.
My morning fell apart quick and even though I can cite numerous reasons why racing at Bradbury was slipping from the picture, none of them were really valid.
I could rationalize and exclaim how cold it was....yet last weekend I was out snowshoe running at 7:30 am and at about the same temps and on the same course.
I ran out of supplies for my cold weather prep and had to take time for a trip to Home Depot.......yet I stopped working for about an hour to go out to breakfast.
I was pretty darn lame from Saturday yet I managed to get up on the roof to clean snow so I can't use that as an excuse.
I spent all last week exclaiming how the patriots didn't show up for the game against the Jets, I couldn't understand how could they prepare so hard and just not deliver on game day.
Here I was Sunday morning after many weeks of preparing for a fun snowshoe race and like the Patriots, I didn't show up.....though for me it was literal.
To stay true with my confessions, I just didn't want to go......oh, I rationalized and could cite many reasons and excuses but to be honest I didn't have it in me on this day.
So... here I am guilty as charged, I didn't break a bone, no one in my family passed away, I had no emergency to keep me away.......I just didn't show up and though I was fine with it at the time, right now I am a bit pissed at myself.
At least the Jets lost!